She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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