I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Randomize