I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
Randomize
