he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
