There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
