Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
