just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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