I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
