FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Randomize