i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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