Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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