that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
No subtext here. People are naked.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Randomize