Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Randomize
