Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
We just shotgunned beers for America
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
