so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
