One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Randomize
