Just fell off a train. Bad.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
