Heybabeimwearingurpanties
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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