Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
My penis needs a shock collar
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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