I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
