Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
