Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize
