Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Randomize
