My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize
