i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
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