Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Randomize
