found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
