Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Randomize