$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
Randomize
