Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize
