I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
