Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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