Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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