THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
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