he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I have fence marks all over my body
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Everclear isn't food dammit
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
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