The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Randomize