i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize
