this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Randomize
