they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
vagina is talking i cant
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
