Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Randomize
