she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
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