then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
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