proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Randomize
