I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
