Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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