i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
even my farts smell like vagina
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Randomize
