If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
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