soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
