If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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