At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
He is an equal opportunity slut.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Randomize
